TONY GILLAN: The hype of the 'Super' Bowl is even duller than the event itself

But it’s difficult to imagine a more vacuous sporting occasion than the “Super” Bowl, an event in American football that the organisers think planet Earth generally is captivated by.

For reasons they refuse to share, Americans refer to the sport as “football”. Every game played has 60 minutes of action, but with the hour stretched beyond credulity. With the Super Bowl it’s even worse.

The 2022 final saw a victory for Miami Rovers over the Cincinnati Quite-Goods (*subs to check). Undoubtedly a big event, it was watched globally by 112million people.

Yet it should be remembered that the population of America alone is around 330million. In the UK it attracted 1.3million, meaning that a mere 98% of Brits were completely uninterested.

We shouldn’t mind too much. Within reason, television should offer something for fans of every sport; even the tedious ones.

The problem is the ludicrous hype. No chance of a quick chorus of Abide With Me then the kick-off; not at the Super-Bowl.

How exciting is it really if they need to inflict all the other grating razzmatazz on the viewer?

It’s all very American; which is fine if you happen to be American. But what are they telling us for?

The game was broadcast on BBC, for four hours. Yet ITV news was also breathlessly telling an uninterested British public about it the next day, declaring it the “coolest Super Bowl ever.”

In an unsuccessful attempt to verify this, they showed clips of the half-time hip-hop show featuring Snoop Dogg.

I am obliged to say that the ageing Mr Dogg didn’t look especially “cool”, being as he was so similarly dressed to a woman I had seen in the Spar in North Hylton only that morning, who also hadn’t bothered to change from her pyjamas. Still, at least Mr Dogg had his teeth in.

Some are counting the days to the 2023 Super Bowl. I hope they enjoy it. But if they can manage to keep it to themselves the rest of us would be warmly appreciative.

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