Ooh la la: Jarrow ranked worst for 'this sort of thing' in UK sex survey
A UK-wide sex survey has ranked South Tyneside’s towns - lowly
Jarrow has been named as the least amorous place in Tyne and Wear in a survey carried out on the UK’s bedroom activities.
The survey was conducted by erotic goods company Lovehoney, producing a “UK sex map” in which the nation’s towns and cities were ranked by purchases of the company’s ware.
A league table of 691 sees Jarrow, to make a football analogy, staving off relegation back in 669th position. However, nowhere in Tyne and Wear is pushing for Europe, as it were. Hebburn is at 418, South Shields 640.
Top was Whitley Bay at 142. Newcastle has finally enjoyed a derby victory finishing at 421 with Sunderland back at 636, slightly behind Gateshead at 633. Wallsend is at 628. Further afield, Morpeth was 58th.
Named as the “UK’s sexiest town” is Waltham Cross in Hertfordshire, population 8,600.
Many of the highest ranked towns have small populations, although that might be about to change. There is no evidence of any small town experiencing difficulties with either television reception or Wi-Fi.
The survey used a year’s data to analyse what Brits are buying, revealing the UK’s biggest sexual wellness trends and hotspots. An interactive map has been launched, allowing users to see where their town ranks.
The survey provides details, some of it rather graphic, about what people are buying in terms of both quantity and dimensions, most popular flavours and favourite costumes. South Shields’ favourite costume was named as French maid, while other towns’ preferences were not revealed.
It also provided the Gazette with a considerable challenge when deciding which words to use in this report. However, a decision not to conduct a vox pop about the story on the streets of South Tyneside was reached almost instantly.
Lovehoney’s Annabelle Knight, explained the success of smaller towns saying: “Sexual wellness doesn’t only exist in big cities, it’s for everyone.
“Our data often shows strong engagement from smaller communities, where people may value the privacy, choice, and convenience of shopping online.
“It’s always great to see pleasure alive and well in every corner of the UK, and the sex map is a reminder that sometimes the most unexpected places have the most interesting stories to tell.”
Jarrow’s population is around 30,000.